Drumroll please....

Claire slept through the night!!!! That's right, the whole entire night! I fed her a bottle at 7:30, nursed her around nine, and she slept from 9:30 until 5:30am!! It's amazing how you feel after a good night's sleep!

Winery Weekend

Saturday was Ryan and my first big date (if you can call it a date with 10 other people) and day out without Claire. It was heavenly!! I love her so much, but it was so nice to be out and enjoy myself baby free.

The plan was for me to drop Claire off at my mom and dad's at 11:30, all of our friends to meet at our house at noon, and off we go. Did it go as planned? Of course not. I was up at 7 with Claire and let Ryan sleep in until about 9. I fed her, got in my snuggle time with her, then got her things together and gave her a bath; then threw in a load of laundry, straightened up the house, and where is Ryan...on the computer. I mean, come on!!! I asked him to make up enough bottles for 24 hours, and he comes in with 2 made and said that we only had 2 clean bottles. Someone, I'm not mentioning any names here, forgot to run the dishwasher last night, so that certain someone (uh hum, Ryan) had to hand wash 10 bottles, inserts, nipples, and caps, HA! So, when people started arriving at noon(ish) I handed her off to Andrea while I finished making up the bottles. At 12:30 we were off...not too bad for the first overnight packing/getting ready trip for Claire.

We had a great time at the winery, it was very hot that day, and soooo humid. We got a good table in the shade and had a great time, chatting, taking pictures, and listening to the one-man band. We lasted about 3 hours then headed back closer to home so I could pump--check on Claire--and finish off at a local bar. I was so proud of myself for hanging in with all of them until 8-ish, and then I had to be taken home so I could pump again and go to bed. I was so worried about my breast milk being tainted with the alcohol, so I combined the whole days worth of pumps into a pitcher and made the bottles up that way...my mom laughed at my concern.

I was up the next morning at 6:30 to go and pick her up--I missed her so much! ( :

Anyways, some pictures of the day to share

My handsome hubby


The boys


The girls


The aftermath


We went to brunch Sunday morning with my parents and sister--Claire had her first blow-out poop there...it went all up her back, all over my shirt and I had to use the disgusting bathroom baby-changer to change her and clean her up. My sister said that you could hear her screaming outside the bathroom, and down the hall where the tables were...of course her binky had fallen on the floor and I couldn't give it back to her, and sucking on your finger only lasts for a minute or two. After she was all cleaned up, she could finally finish HER brunch!

IN LAWS...

Yesterday Ry wanted to stop by his parents because his dad had called and said that they wanted to see Claire. I told Ry that it would be a short visit, and he was ok with that. His mother was the first to take Claire. I was trying to tell her and his sister and Dad some cute stories about Claire since they don't see her very often, and we don't call and update them enough, and his mother totally cuts me off and doesn't even let me get one sentence out. She keeps cutting in to say how cute Claire is and how big she is, over and over and over. Completely disregarding anything that I have to say, talking over me, just plain rude. I tried several times to talk about how many ounces she's taking, and how she's finally found her hands, how she had her first major blow-out poop that morning at brunch, etc. Didn't give me the time of day...any of the three. I don't understand why they don't want to hear about her. They are her grandparents, they should WANT to know about her eating, sleeping, the new things she's doing, and yes, even about her pooping, but they don't. They don't give a damn about anything Ryan or I has to say about her. All his mother is concerned about is getting new pictures of her because "she doesn't have any recent ones". (On a side note, there are numerous snapshots framed in the living room and on the fridge, not ONE SINGLE ONE of me....hmmmmmm.) Who cares about pictures, you have her in your arms, enjoy it!!!! Then we asked his dad, who mind you is the one that called in the first place, to hold her and he says no. WTF??? NO? Are you kidding me? Why wouldn't you want to hold your first, and only, grandchild!?!?!?!? Ohhhh, I am livid. THEN, we asked that they hold her on her left side because she favors her right side and her head is starting to get flat. I then went on to tell them that she may have to wear a helmet if we don't correct it by positioning, and his mom and sister both were like, "ohhhh really..." with these looks on their faces like she had a f*cking fatal disease or something! They were the same way when she had to wear her splints on her feet and when they seen that her belly button stuck out because of her hernia. They need to get on the flippin Internet and do some research on preemies. The things she has are all VERY COMMON problems with premature babies, especially when there was low fluid in utero. So naive. I talked (more like vented) to an older lady at work about all of this and I think she nailed it on the head. I am going through all these emotions for the first time--being a first time mom, and a mother of a premature baby,at that. And it is so hard for me to understand why they aren't so happy that we're not dealing with a major health problem. It could be so much worse than some temporary splints on her feet or a helmet. Or a belly button that doesn't look "normal". And speaking of normal, why do they always have to use the word "normal baby". She is a normal baby, she is just a premature normal baby. I've corrected his mother and father more than once when they say "...like a normal baby", and I correct them with "...you mean a full-term baby". I think I am just so sad that things are the way they are. And I feel so bad for Ryan because he is stuck in the middle of all of this and it's not fair to him. I hate to put him in the middle of this situation, but at the same time I cannot sit there and have these feeling about my baby, and not let him know how I feel. I do not ever put them down to him, only bring the issues of the last visit to his attention. And I think deep down he knows it, but I'm sure it's hard for him to accept. He is so proud of his new baby girl, and then we go over there and his own father doesn't even want to hold her? I just don't understand it...I don't understand it at all. And what infuriates me is that Claire is the one to suffer. It's not her fault that her paternal grandparents are cold people. It's not her fault that me and Ryan have an awesome relationship with my parents and see them on a regular basis. My mom watches Claire M-F so we can work and provide for her. And I'm sure that there is a little bit of jealousy on their part because we are so close with my family..including Ryan, but it's no reason to have the attitude that they do. I just needed to vent on this issue, thanks for anyone that made it to the end.
Some cuteness....it's amazing how well she sleeps in our bed....

TGIF

The weekend is almost here!! YEAH!! This has been a long, long week. I am looking forward to some R&R this weekend. We have an exciting weekend planned. Tonight we are going to our favorite Mexican place with my parents for dinner, then an early night at home...maybe rent and watch the movie "21" that came out. Anyone seen it? Tomorrow I am so excited because it is Ryan and my first real "date" since before we had Claire. We did go out to lunch a few times when she was in the hospital and went to dinner one night at PF Ch@ngs to celebrate our one year anniversary that I was in the hospital for, but not really a real date. We are going to the winery tomorrow with 10 or so of our closest friends!! We are dropping Claire off at Gram and Gramps at 11:30 and meeting everyone at our house to leave by noon! We have to be home by about 6 so that I can pump, then we're planning on doing dinner or drinks out as well. This is the first time Claire will be staying the night out since we brought her home. A little bittersweet, but I know she is in the best hands (besides mommy and daddy's) and they will take great care of her. Then Sunday we get to sleep in too--Claire is going to church with Gram and Gramps then finally home to us. It will be like a weekend before we became parents..except I will probably call a million times and look at her pictures a zillion times....oh how I love my sweet girl.

Ryan came up to my office with Claire this morning to sign some legal documents that I had drawn up to make sure that Claire was taken care of in case anything would happen to us. I wanted to make sure that it was in black and white that she was to go to my parents--or my sister--if we would die. Then we did a living will, and power of attorney since we were at it. Depressing to think about, but you have to have these things in line--just in case. So, I called Ryan and told him to change her out of her jammies and into a dress and he told me that he had already dressed her...in a onesie! Now, there is nothing wrong with a onesie if we're at home hanging out...and they are cute ones that are pink, purple, stripes, flowered, etc, but not if we're taking her somewhere. So I had to tell him, go into her dresser, 3rd drawer and pick out a dress and panties to match....men!!! It was nice to bring her around the office and show her off though...they are all bombarded with e-mailed pictures and my endless stories of her, so they were all happy to actually SEE her in person.

Finally, a few pics of her doing tummy time...which she hates!!! I've found that if we use the boppy she can stand it a few minutes longer, but that's stretching it! She looks so much like her daddy in these, it's scary!




I LOVE this one!


She had enough



HAPPY FRIDAY!

Headbands

A few of you have asked where I get Claire's headbands; it looks like they are only available locally in stores, but you can get them on-line at www.weeones.com. They are the babybands, double grosgrain bow on the stretchy headband. Claire wears the 0-6month size.

Wordless Wednesday

How can you not love this face...Happy Wednesday!

HAPPY 3 MONTH BIRTHDAY CLAIRE ELIZABETH!

I can hardly believe that 3 months have already passed since you blessed us all with your arrival. You have made Daddy and Me the happiest parents in the world. Your smile makes me melt...and you know it! You are really starting to show your personality with lots of different facial expressions. You are smiling more and get so excited when we talk to you by kicking your feet and moving your arms all around. You can hold your head up for a few minutes at a time and move it from side to side when you're on your tummy, and you LOVE your hands!

I found my hands...almost



I GOT IT!!!! This is better than a binky!


All done with the hand thing...I'm ready for my bath now!


I sat and rocked you forever after you nursed at 3:30 this morning, knowing that sooner than later you will be squirming to get down and move around. I love to see you growing and thriving, but at the same time I don't want to lose my little baby...my three month post-partum hormones are raging up and I'm starting to tear up...We love you forever and always Tink!

Mommy

Happy Friday!

It's finally Friday!! Whew...what a week! What a night last night! Claire was up on and off all night. I think it may have been her tummy because she wanted to be up over our shoulders with her tummy pressed pretty tight on us. And she was a little gassy and burpy so we did what any parent would do who wanted some sleep...brought her to bed with us. Of course, she loves sleeping in bed with us, who wouldn't?!!? We always bring her in on the weekend mornings after her early bottle to snuggle and sleep with us until about 9 or so, but not usually in the middle of the night to actually SLEEP for the night. But we were both so tired and just wanted to get another 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep. So Ryan brings her in, hands her to me, she snuggled right in to my face (which I admit, I LOVE), and slept soundly until we woke her up at 6. We'll see how this weekend goes. Ryan is going out of town overnight to the Lake of the Ozarks for a fishing tournament with his best bud Saturday, so I'll be on my own Sat afternoon-Sunday evening! Not really, my mom and I are taking Claire to get her 3 month picture taken on Saturday afternoon, and my sister said she'd stay the night Saturday night. It really won't be that bad, and he deserves some fun time. I know he'll enjoy himself.

Last night was bath night, and I took some cute shots of my little Tink--her legs and arms never stop moving! Too cute!



Hi Mom!

OUCH!

I need some advice...I am trying to slowly wean Claire off of full breast milk, which means I am slowly trying to wean myself off of the pump. I still want to pump in the morning--when I get a large amount of milk--and in the evening and night, but not during the day at work. I researched online yesterday and they say that it's possible to train your body to not need to pump/empty the breast during the day, but I'm having a really hard time adjusting. I have been slowing increasing the time between the pumps and decreasing the amount of time that I actually pump, but still have sore, hard boobs that scream to be nursed! I am not ready to give up breastfeeding in the mornings and night with her, and still want to provide her with breast milk to be mixed with the formula for her bottles during the day. Any advice on this subject? I know it can be done, but would love some advice or suggestions.

And to close this post, a darling photo of my Angel before her first trip to church on Sunday!

I'm a big girl now!

Claire has graduated to a big girl binky...Gone are the round, green hospital binkys--a little bittersweet...she's growing up so fast!



With her new binky--pink, of course



With her Auntie Ellen



Sleeping on Daddy...

Fourth of July

A belated 4th of July post...

We have a park across the street from our house that does a really neat fireworks show every year for the fourth. The past 2 years we've had a big BBQ/party to celebrate, eat, drink, then watch the fireworks. This year, we opted to just invite a few friends over to watch the show. My mom and dad came over, along with their Goddaughter who is visiting from Florida, and a few of our friends. I wasn't sure how Claire was goign to react to the noise, but she just sat there and watched while my mom fed her her bottle.

Claire with her Gramps


My best friend from high school--Tara, Jon, and Bailey




Friday we had my inlaws--ugggggg--over along with my parents and sister to BBQ and play washers. It was beautiful weather--low 80's no humidity--which is amazing for St. Louis in July. We got to enjoy our new patio and Ryan made some yummy ribs and burgers.




Claire with her 4th of July outfit on..getting ready to run to the store with Mommy


I love you Gram!



It was a great weekend!

Girls Night Out

All day Friday I looked forward to my girls night out. I was ready to get dressed up and head out for a few drinks with my friends. I went home after work and fed and played with Claire. We ate dinner, then I gave her a bath, got her jammies on, snuggled for a while, pumped, then headed out for the night. I got to the bar, ordered a blueberry vodka and club--which by the way tasted amazing!!!--and started chatting. I was having a good old time for about an hour, then realized that I missed her soooo much. I ordered another drink thinking that surely the alcohol would have some effect on me, but no, I just wanted to go home and be with my newly formed family. Don't get me wrong, I love my girlfriends and don't know what I'd do without them, but I had to go home and see her. I paid my tab and drove home as fast as I could to see her. I walked in and see her and her daddy sleeping soundly on the couch together...it melted my heart. She was absolutely content being held and snuggled by her daddy--and he was just as content. Every time I see him with her I get choked up, because she brings out the softest side of him I've ever seen. So, Saturday night it was Ryan's turn to go out with his buddies. He left and my sister came over and hung out with me and Claire. He called a few times to "see what we were doing"...you know he was calling to check on her--which is cute. About midnight I hear the garage door open, and in walks Ryan...he was just "ready to come home". Now if you know my husband, you know that he is NEVER just "ready" to come home. I think he missed his little girl. He went and showered and scooped her up from me...which I was fine with because I went to bed.

Point of my rambling...having a baby changes EVERYTHING!

Splish Splash

Claire went swimming for the first time last night at her Gram's house...some pics to share



Hi Mommy!


Look at that milk tongue


Kicking her little tootsies--playing with a friend, JD...he wanted to know why she wasn't coming IN the pool with him


With Mommy


With Daddy


Swimming wore her out...



Oh to be a kid again...

Happy 11 Week Birthday

This time 11 weeks ago, I was being prepped for an emergency c-section. I will never forget the terror that was racing through me...partially because of the major surgery that I was about to endure, but more so because she was 7 weeks early and the doctors weren't sure what her condition was going to be...I have never been so scared in my life.

The miracle of it all though, is that tonight I will sing Happy Birthday to her and snuggle her, kiss her, hug her, kiss her some more and thank God that he sent her to me.

3 minutes after being born


Being monitored in the NICU


Look at her now--chubby and healthy...all 9 pounds of her!




Happy 11 week birthday Claire Elizabeth...you have no idea how much you have changed my life...it amazes me how much I love you. I smile just thinking about you. I love you forever and always....Mommy

A little bragging

I AM BACK INTO MY OLD PANTS!!!! Finally, I made it back into my pre-pregnancy pants--and they look good! I was able to get them on a few weeks ago, and button and zip them, but I looked like a stuffed sausage. Today, I tried on my black capri's for work, and they actually have a little give in the waist! Now, as for my tops, that's another story. My boobs have grown enormous because of breastfeeding, so all of my tops are a little snug across the chest to say the least. I spent the last 2 weekends shopping for new tops to wear to work, and got enough for about 3 weeks. I never anticipated buying new clothes AFTER being pregnant, but I'm not complaining, I love to shop.

PS. I get Claire's big headband bows at Stride Rite, they're a little pricy at $10 a piece, but so cute and she'll be able to wear them for a few years....she NEVER goes anywhere without one!

Monday's...

WOW, it was hard coming back to work after a long weekend...I was a little teary dropping her off, but fine once I got in the car. It's getting easier and easier. I still haven't talked to work about the part time thing, I have so much catching up to do, I don't want to freak them out just yet!

I just love this black and white outfit and headband. We attempted to go and get her picture taken in it last week, but things didn't go as planned. Some cuteness to share on this Monday morning...



Mommy and Claire



And some bragging...she is sleeping between 5-7 hours at night for us!! YEAH!!! The books say that 100% breastfed babies eat every 2-3-4 hours round the clock, but Claire seems to stretch it out at night for us. We talked to the Dr. Saturday about it she said her weight gain is amazing (she's up to 9 pounds---she's more than tripled her birth weight in 10 weeks) and to let her sleep as long as she wants at night. That means 6 straight hours for me and Ryan, which even if it's every other night or a few times a week, makes a huge difference. I am also happy to report that this is my third week back at work and I am still able to keep up with my pumping at work and she is still on all breast milk! The Dr. commended me on that at her visit as well. My boobs may never look the same again, but look at those cheeks!!! The power of breast milk is amazing...thank you to Tara for encouraging me when I wanted to give up weeks ago!


I have lots of pictures from this weekend to share that I will post later once I upload them.

Happy Early 4th of July

I really don't think she could be any cuter...maybe without the binky, but the kid loves that thing!




Happy 4th of July to you all!!!

Sarah & Claire

Cherries and Bows

My sister took some snapshots of Claire and me last week--I just love these...










And she's done...I love when they sleep like this ( :