Happy 2 Month Birthday Connor Joseph

Connor Joseph,

I feel like I have blinked my eyes and you are already two months old. I have no idea where the time has gone. I can close my eyes and still feel you inside of my belly and part of me misses that. Part of me misses that beautiful swollen belly that you called home for so many months. But as I sit here and write this letter to you, I look down at you sleeping in my arms and can't imagine it an other way. Your beautiful, long, dark lashes flutter as you take a deep breath and stretch to find my shirt to hold. The steady suck, suck, swallow of you nursing calms me in a way that I forgot how much I missed that. Your cheeks are filled out and plump and I can't imagine not kissing them every second of every day.

Your eyes are dark and there is a connection when we lock eyes that only a Mama has with their baby. You know me in a way that only a baby can. And I know you in a way that only a mama can. I can comfort you when no one else can and I love that. You want me over anyone else, and I know that that won't last forever, so I am soaking up the small slot of time that I have.

Your smile is contagious. Your coos and ooh's are some of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard. I thank God that he gave us you, healthy and perfect, to call our son and lead through life as your guides.

My sweet baby boy, please know that we prayed for you and wanted you so badly. You will never understand how much I am in love with you, so please let me tell you over and over a thousand times a day. And let me shower you with kisses and snuggles and hugs and butterfly kisses. Because I want you know how much you mean to me.

Connor, you have completed me in a way that feels so...right. I feel like our family is just the way God planned it to be.

I love you forever and always,

Mommy